I have put off creating this website for such a long time. When I launched my business last year, I told myself that I could build it through contacts and word of mouth and a website was superfluous. That worked well for a while (thank you, lovely people) but it isn’t the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I know deep down that if I am asking you, my clients, to confide bravely your challenges and vulnerabilities, then I also need to be brave and share something of myself, so that you know who you have in the room with you and can make an informed decision about whether to trust me.
So, what was getting in my way? Let me introduce you to my special friend. He speaks with a hiss like Gollum and sits on my left shoulder where he can whisper effectively into my ear. What does he say? “Well, Precious! This is silly isn’t it? All those people who respected you will be sneering! Fancy holding yourself out as a coach! What do you know about anything? Who do you think you are?” And here’s the favourite, straight from South Wales. “Getting a bit too big for our boots, aren’t we?” He’s my imposter monster. Do you have one?
I’m not entirely sure who the sneering people can be. I don’t seem to have met them. What I do know is that working with one person at a time or one group at a time feels quite different from tossing over my professional reputation for general scrutiny.
Then I received a message from someone I taught long ago, someone who suffered a bereavement just before an important exam, someone who is now in a very grown up important role in a law firm. It went like this. “Kerry, so pleased to hear you are coaching. You may not remember me but you helped me find the focus to get through back then. It was hard but I made it.” You know who you are. Thank you.
Realisation dawned. I have called myself a coach for a short time, but I have been coaching for years. AND YEARS. AND YEARS. I have given myself a new perspective. It is ridiculous to be thinking that this is bravery when so many wonderful people are daring greatly to save us from COVID19. So here I am, out there, in the arena. The important people have my back and it feels just fine. Is there something you really want to try? What gets in your way? If you knew you would succeed, what would you do? And if you have one of those monsters whispering in your ear, let’s shine the light on it together and watch it shrivel.